It's ok if things are NOT working out
Updated: Jul 23
Uncertainty is defined as not being completely confident or sure of something. Not knowing what to do or believe. Unsteady.
Uncertainty is uncomfortable. It is the feeling many of us experienced during Covid-19.....and it is not an easy place to be. Life is full of change and because of this fact, uncertainty is something we all have to learn to embrace. Especially me. I HATE not knowing, I like having answers and knowing what to do next. I like to know the why behind everything. But sometimes we don't get the answers when we want them. You can work hard and the outcome you get doesn't match the work you put it or the picture you had envisioned in your mind. Sometimes we are just left in the place of having questions but no answers. No God comes to answer, no friend or family calls just in time to put your mind at ease or offer help. Nothing.
But what looks like nothing.....can sometimes be the very something that leads us to the results we want. So be careful how you judge the uncertainty or challenges you may be facing right now. The uncertainty or disappointments you are facing can be as much part of the journey to getting to the destination you are trying to get to. Have you thought that maybe that challenge you are going through right now as you read this, is perhaps happening to help get you to that goal you have in mind? Look at the struggle as part of the journey to getting there....whatever your goal may be.
In life you don't always get what you want, and even this can be a blessing in disguise. Sometimes getting what we think we want can be the biggest curse to some people. There are benefits to not getting what you want. Treat rejection as just....redirection to getting to your goal. Life is not a movie and we are not like a director that knows how each scene plays into bringing the film together. Therefore if not handled well, uncertainty can lead you to make decisions that you may regret later or even take you off the right path and into the wrong one. When things are not happening the way you thought they would, or taking longer than you feel they should; it can feel like maybe things will never change. You can even start to question yourself and convince yourself that it's pointless to keep pursuing the outcome you desire. I have lived with uncertainty all my life but it never gets easier.....but I am learning that part of being at peace in the midst of uncertainty is to think of it as a stepping stone to getting to where-ever you are trying to get to. It is alright to feel frustrated that things are not going your way or feel disappointed that something has not happened the way you hoped and worked so hard for. But sometimes we do not have the "bird's eye view" of things. You can't always know or see what is just ahead so you have to just do the best that you can with what you have in your hands now because even if in the end you get the outcome you desire; change is always waiting for us around the corner, so there will always be another obstacle, hurdle or something else to overcome.
Be OK with not knowing the answer right now by focusing on what you can do in this moment. What difference does you worrying about what you can't change make? The uncertainty continues either way so why not channel that energy differently. Do what you can, feel whatever emotions come but let the pieces to the puzzle come together without you having to be in control of how that will happen.
Sometimes in trying to get away from the uncertainty we end up becoming our own stumbling block to the progress we are trying to make. If things were going exactly as you would like them to, would you ask why is it happening like this? most times, we don't even ask, we just embrace and enjoy that things have worked out the way we want and we move on to the next thing. So the same applies when things are not working out your way. Look at the uncertainty or struggle as part of the journey/process to getting to that part where it works out the way you want. All the things we enjoy in life went through a process before becoming the end product we see- so maybe the challenge or uncertainty you are facing right now is part of the process to getting you to the end product you desire. Stop trying to change it or understand it. Take focus away from what you CANNOT change and put energy and focus on doing what you CAN. Lastly...take it all one day at a time.