• Just Pause

Are you happy in life?

Updated: Jul 14, 2020

What does happiness mean to you?

The answer is completely personal to you but one thing is for sure; the only person responsible for your happiness is YOU.

You cannot let your happiness be determined by someone else's definition. Don't let someone else give you permission or validation to do what makes you happy. For me, some of the ways I have learned to consistently be happy is by practising balance and taking time out to make myself a priority in life. This is not selfish, it's called self care and self love. You can do this in many ways regardless of your circumstances or budget. Your needs matter too so make sure you take time out and take care of yourself inside and outside. You can't be of much help to someone else if you are in pieces yourself.

Mindset is everything

When it comes to happiness, the type of mindset you have is what matters. One of the things I learned from the most unhappy of experiences in my life is that how you choose to think impacts how you feel. I try to live with the mindset of no longer allowing my happiness to be dependent on what the circumstances are. Allow yourself to feel whatever the feeling is about the situation you are facing but don't let being happy depend on the situation or outcome because this too can change. If you want to live being happy on a consistent basis, you have to release some control and realise that you have access to happiness any time/anywhere regardless of what your circumstances are. The way to tap into this power is starting with your mindset;. Mindset is the way you choose to view/think about a situation you are facing. The way you choose to think can either turn an obstacle into an opportunity or turn an opportunity into an obstacle. The choice is yours.

We don't always choose the obstacles we find ourselves in, but we can make a choice over how we respond to those obstacles.


Combine the right mindset with positive action.Take action and do what you can even if it's only a small step....big changes begin with small steps. Happiness is not just what you feel, it involves taking action. Don't wait for happiness to happen to you, go and find it or create it. Make a list of what you are unhappy with and ask yourself what small actions can I take to start and change that? When it rains, some people get grumpy and complain, others get an umbrella out and get on with their day. Which one are you?

Don't play the avoidance game

Some of us are so talented at avoiding anything that makes us unhappy or uncomfortable not realising this is a trap to permanent unhappiness and misery. Start dealing with those issues you have been avoiding. Begin with the smaller things and work your way towards the bigger stuff. It is better for a season to experience a bit of unhappiness that comes when we are addressing something challenging instead of ignoring the problem completely- avoidance may feel better for the time being but over time, this approach will only chip away at your happiness/peace of mind.


When struggling to be happy, start thinking of all the things that you like about your life and that you are grateful for. There is ALWAYS something. A concentration camp survivor by the name Viktor Frankl in his book speaks on how even in the middle of the harsh circumstances of camp life, he found ways to see something positive! If he can do this then you too can find something to be grateful for. If you need a little help, click here.

Gratitude does not take your problems away, it helps you get your mind into the right gear in order to deal with the negativity you may be facing.

Invest in your happiness. Take action where you can, don't ask anyone for permission or validation, your happiness is personal to you and only you.

Celebrities teach us that money and material things have their limits......Happiness is an inside job and you are the only person responsible for your own happiness.

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